×Hates×
ur mom
Innocence/ is really overrated/ purity/ is often missunderstood/ curruption/ is hated unless/ you're invited to participate/ then it becomes your sunday morning
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I miss Jason right now, I am having that overwhelming missing him feeling, the kind that makes your heart swell in joy and pain all at the same time, I miss him terribly. I have been giving him grief this week, I dont like acting mean to the person I love most, it makes me feel horrible inside. I just am sad I cant see him, I am jealous of the people who get to lay their eyes upon him everyday, those people who get to be near him...they dont know I am here, missing him, I would trade everything to be able to be in his presence like they do. I am so jealous of those people. I love my Jason. I miss his touch. I miss sitting in the car with him and going over to his side, he putting his seat back, me getting on top of him....and no this isnt going to lead into sex (yet hee hee) but like talking to him, laying on his chest...listening to his heartbeat, him kissing me for no reason other than he loves me, him holding me, me being able to cry in his arms because his arms are the only arms I want to be in....I miss hearing I love you in person...I love hearing him say it no matter what...I love being on the phone with him and having him saying I love you a billion times to me, I love the way he gets mushy with me, I love the way he wanted to save Mr. Mohawk after I told him they couldnt hurt him...I love the way he treats me like I am precious, and I love the way he loves me, the way it is more than most people have, what he and I have....he doesnt push me into anything and he understands me when I get crazy. He treats me like a person...he doesnt disrespect me, he holds me with care...he wouldnt leave me, wouldnt abandon me...He kisses my forehead...he kisses my cheeks...he kisses my lips, he really loves me, I savior every moment I have with him...I calls me beautiful, other people have said it, but it is different with him, it is real with him....I love the way he gets all jealous...it shows me he cares...I love it when he lets his guard down showing me he trusts me...I love the way he gives me a warm feeling, I love the way he can make me smile even when I am crying, I love the way he jokes about my millions of shoes, and how I get to be the dark one...I love the way he can stare into my eyes and see everything....how we can look at each other and still get that giggly feeling...how he tries to cheer me up when I am sad...how he tries to make me feel better when I am sick...how he always encourages me when I am nervous about myself ...how he shares everything with me...how we both love dr. pepper... how when my doggy passed, tried to help me feel better about it...how he wants to get me a puppy one day...how he will let me decorate our place...how he watches me sleep...how he holds my hand....how we take long walks...how I have to get on my tippy toes to kiss him...how I fit so perfectly into his arms...how he cant dance...but does for me...how he smiles at me...how he never gives up on me....how he says I sing good...even if I dont think I do...how he loves my writing...how he tells me I look pretty even if I feel terrible...how the spaces between my fingers were made to be filled with his...how he writes me emails with no other purpose other than to say I love you...How he tries to be macho...how he gave up bad habits because I asked him to...how he went away with his family for spring break and wrote me a 7 page long letter...how he buys me things for no reason, just because he is thinking of me...how he was the first person to give me roses...how our first kiss was outside near a bunch of flowers...how he tells me my hands are tiny...how I like scary movies and how he likes scary movies because I'd jump into his arms...how he and I shared something special on March 19th 2003, how I first saw him on halloween and he was a monster and I was a princess and he took my halloween candy...how during our first phone call I felt like I knew him for years, how we started dating February 16th 2002, how I feel like he is the person I could spend the rest of my life with, how I would love for nothing more than to be his wife someday, how we'd be the cool parents, how he loves his old cat, how he cares so much for me, how when I wrecked he was worried about me driving, how we stay on the phone for hours and hours and hours....how he says I love you more...how he means all those sweet things he says to me...how he'll go get milk for me when I dont wanna...how I love cuddling with him...how he pulls me close...how he does crazy things to make me laugh..how he tells me he loves me more than life itself, how he loves me forever, how he'll love me even after he dies...how he was scared when I wrecked....I love him for soooooo many reasons, I cant even list them all....these are just a fraction of the reasons I love him....I love him more than my life....I am teary eyed just typing this...so many memories..I love him god I love him I wish he was here right now to hold me....God I love him